There are a few rules that remain constant in life no matter the circumstances. Get out of the left lane if you're going the speed limit (constantly broken by the people of my home state), don't be a jerk unless you're prepared to have people be one to you in return, and you don't talk about another person's job. Today is the day I break that last rule.
The UMass men's lacrosse team was failed by their equipment manager in their semifinal match-up against Towson last night. It was a struggle to find a clear picture of their full kit, but look above and you'll see one of the grossest uniforms you'll ever find on a lacrosse field. Black helmet, black shorts, black cleats, black socks, maroon top.
Yikes.
Before I dive too deep into this, I'm no fashion expert or anything, but I feel like I can at least put together a solid fit when I step on to the field. Let's start at the top. Black helmets are a tough look to pull off, so we're already starting behind the 8-ball here. If you're going to go with the black dome you need to include some brighter colors to offset the dark void being created around your head. It's not an impossible task, but with maroon as your other primary, the job becomes a lot harder than necessary. They do have a silver/grey option but it's clear that's a secondary choice and would not look right as a primary decal color with a maroon jersey.
Speaking of jerseys, I'm pretty sure the Minutemen have been rocking the same jerseys for 20 years. The boys need a fresh look like they got with their grey jerseys. Those aren't the best looking ones, but I'll give credit to the equipment team for at least trying something new. The school's mascot is one of the more unique options in the country, why not do something with that instead of just plastering "UMass" in a straight line across the center because you're too afraid to make a bold decision?
Yes, you could say that Towson did the same thing with their jerseys based on the picture, but Towson consistently has top tier crispy uniforms in the country which makes the comment about a start bar of text null and void.
Next up: plain black shorts? At least it matches the helmet. Other than that BOOOOOOOORING.
The true killer of this whole look though is the feet. Black cleats with black socks is not just a cardinal sin, but THE cardinal sin. I'm a black sock stan, and I know that puts me in the minority, but I have never and will never go black cleats with black socks. White socks are the main look for this, but at minimum they could've at least gone maroon.
Writer's note: I originally thought I'd be done after the debacle with the shoes, but then I noticed the solid black gloves. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, but this is absolutely putrid. I have no words other than the current equipment manager needs to be taken straight to jail. No grand jury, no trial, straight to jail.
Clean it up, UMass.
Comments
Post a Comment